Temple of the Red Lotus Vending Tent

Temple of the Red Lotus Vending Tent
See us at pagan festivals in the SouthEast!

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Sacred Warrior Harlots

Sacred Warrior Harlots
Inara de Luna, Temple of the Red Lotus (C) 2007

Sex is a very powerful force. Many who use sex in magic and ritual recommend that it NOT be used by those new to magic or the Craft, because of the amount of power generated by the sex act. For millenia, church officials and political authorities have made laws and moral guidelines intended to contain the power unleashed by sex.

Unfortunately, these laws and guidelines, written from fear and the desire for control, have had an opposite effect. Rather than suppressing the sex drive and its associated effects, these policies and practices of control, oppression and minimization have actually increased the problems. Rather than educating and training people about their sexuality, we have given them loaded guns with no instructions on how to shoot, or the ethical framework to decide who and when to shoot. People are ruled by "instinctive" drives, which they are taught to be ashamed of, and so they seek to satisfy these urges quietly, furtively, guiltily, and often non-responsibly.

I believe that sex and sexuality are inherently sacred. Sex and pleasure are gifts from the Gods and Goddesses. When we use these gifts in negative, malicious ways, when we engage in sex in exclusively self-serving ways, we devalue, desecrate and contaminate those gifts. In my mind, things like rape are not sex, they're violence. Rapists may use sex as a tool, but the intent and effect is violent.

Yes, this world is quite bereft of the joy, wonder, sweetness and sacredness of sex. Yes, we see a LOT of sex desecrated all around us, from the media and advertising, to the use of rape as a tool of terror in war, to the unhappy and neglected and abused people in relationships everywhere who don't know any better way to be.

And that is where the modern Qadishti or Sacred Whores or Temple Harlots come in. We are uniquely positioned to start changing the world, one embrace at a time. We, who understand the awesome power and sanctity of sexuality, have the responsibility to pass along that understanding to whoever else might be ready to listen. We, who are capable of channeling the Goddess and using her gifts of love and pleasure to heal, have a responsibility to heal the wounded souls, hearts and bodies of those sad, broken, hurting people who come before us. We, who feel overwhelming compassion and love for those who have been neglected and abused by the system and society, have a responsibility to share that compassion and love with others, in an attempt to overturn the thousands of years of suffering this world has endured.

It's not easy. It's a difficult path to follow, for many, many reasons. We will get discouraged. We will get frustrated. We may suffer misunderstandings and sabotage in our efforts. But we must be Warriors, as well as Lovers, resolutely standing by our beliefs that Love can indeed change, and maybe save, the world. We must invoke both sides of the Deities of Love and War. Learning to temper our need to stand resolute with our capacity for compassion is tricky, but it can be done. We can be passive resistors, conscious objectors, role models, activists. We can stand firm in our principles and patiently endure the coming years of darkness and oppression, while our Light grows and our influence finally begins to shift things to a healthier, more sacred place, where sex, pleasure and love are ultimately revered and treasured as the gifts they truly are.

Knowing that what I do and who I am carries a sacred charge helps me shoulder the load. Before I found the concept of the qadishtu or sacred prostitute, I experienced great internal conflict about who and what I was and what I perceived I *should* be based on the larger society's expectations. I am now at peace within myself, although a battle still rages without. I choose to take this head-on by creating my Temple and my various discussion groups. By taking every opportunity to speak to people about the possibilities and promises of sacred sexuality. By subscribing to $pread magazine to support their great work. By any of a number of other little things, I choose every day to confront the issues of our world around sexuality, including prostitutes' rights. By engaging in these things which uphold my values, I maintain integrity and attain serenity with my chosen life, so that I can handle the storms and sacrifices this calling demands. Like I said above, it's not easy....but it's oh soooo worth it!

www.TempleRedLotus.com

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Considering Polyamory

Recently, someone mentioned to me that they were interested in experimenting with polyamory, but weren't sure how to bring it up to their significant other. The following was my response. I thought that others may find this useful as well.

Polyamory is a valid and wonderful lifestyle, for some people. Monogamy is just as valid and wonderful, for some people. Polyamory has become a catch-all word to describe all sorts of non-monogamous relationship choices, so it's important to begin with a question: Why are you considering polyamory?

  • Are you attracted to someone new and want to explore a separate relationship with him/her?
  • Are you interested in being able to be free to follow your urges and hook up with people you meet at festivals and other events?
  • Are you wanting to find a new partner to bring into your existing relationship as an equal?
  • Do you want the freedom to be sexually expressive of your affection with your friends?
  • Are you looking to inject new energy into your existing relationship by beginning a new one?
  • Are you both looking for an occassional playmate to share?
  • Are you bored or frustrated with your current relationship and want some diversion?
  • Do you feel pressured to try polyamory because so many people around you are doing it?
  • Does it seem like a more natural relationship option to you based on your polytheistic spiritual beliefs?
  • Do you have trouble remaining "faithful" to your partner, and so want to find a way to make your "affairs" more legitimate and honest?
Once you've identified your motivations and discovered whether or not your interest in polyamory is positive and healthy (and not diverting you from some deeper relationship issues), then you can begin the conversation with your significant other. I would recommend starting from the place of your motivation, and mentioning polyamory as an option. There are many great resources for defining and describing polyamory, both on the internet, in book form, and in the form of friends who practice the lifestyle.

Beware - polyamory doesn't "fix" or "solve" anything. If you're having problems in your relationship, they will remain and may even become worse if you prematurely embark on an exploration of polyamory. Open and honest communication is the single most important quality necessary to successfully navigating a polyamorous relationship, no matter how many partners are involved.

Also remember the popular poly maxim: "Love is infinite, time and energy are not." Although those of us who identify as polyamorous believe that we are capable of loving any number of people simultaneously, we also realize (or quickly learn) that all relationships take work, time, energy, and attention, which necessarily limits how many partners we can realistically keep up with.

If you and your S.O. do decide to experiment, you should discuss AHEAD of time, some of the following (and this is in no way meant to be an exhaustive list):

  1. Time and energy balance (who needs what kind of time and energy, and how to balance those needs)
  2. What is permissible (flirting with others, kissing & fondling, full intercourse, etc) and when
  3. The option of Veto power (will you each be able to veto the other's choice of additional partner?)
  4. Jealousy (what will you do WHEN jealousy rears its head)
  5. Hierarchy (will you adhere to the primary/secondary structure? will your family become a pod of equals?)
  6. Where trysts can happen (is it okay for your partner to use your shared bed for trysts with their other partner?)
  7. Agree to revisit your agreements regularly, and to communicate constantly about feelings, needs, boundaries, etc, especially if something changes - we often don't know what is going to trigger a reaction until we have that reaction, and so we need the freedom to renegotiate.

There's plenty more, but I encourage you to consider all of this first, and then do some reading and talking with other poly folk. I'd be happy to talk with you more in a private Temple session, if you'd like.

Thursday, March 22, 2007

I see myself as I already am

I am on the Zaadz network (http://templeredlotus.zaadz.com/) and they posted a Question for Reflection today, which has to do with descrbing your dream job. The following is my blog entry answer....

I see myself as I already am

Posted on Mar 22nd, 2007 by Inara : Qadishtu Inara
This is in Response to the Questions and Reflections for March 22, 2007:

I see myself in a flowing gown, hair streaming down my back, surrounded by a lush and luxuriant room, a smile of warmth and love radiating from my face as I reach out to you and pull you into an embrace that makes you cry with the sweetness of it all. I am a Qadishtu priestess, a divine representation of the Goddess, doing her sacred sexualoving work, bringing love, joy, healing and celebration to everyone. We heal the world, one embrace at a time.

I see myself in a Temple, surrounded by my fellow priests and priestesses, teaching them, communing with them, supporting them on this path. I see us joining hands and hearts in a common vision and mission of healing the world's mind-body-spirit split through our ethical and compassionate application of sacred sexuality philosophies and practices.

I see myself seated in a circle of teenagers, all participating at their own comfort levels, as I instruct them in a more sacred approach to sexuality. I hear their questions and honor their curiousity, without judging or criticizing or ridiculing them. I convey to them the awesome responsibility of being sexual beings, while also gently cautioning them about the consequences of irrresponsibility. I also lovingly impart the utter joy and pleasure to be found in truly equal, healthy, balanced sexualoving relationships.

I am Qadishtu. That is my dream job. What would make it even better is if I could possibly find a way to support myself and my Temple without having to devote so many long hours of the day to an office job. But I trust the Goddess has me where she needs me, and where I need to be at this moment.

Namaste and Loving Blessings to you and yours,
Inara

Monday, February 12, 2007

On Gender & Sacred Sexuality

Essay - On Gender & Sacred Sexuality

By Inara de Luna
© April 2006



We all hold within us the energies of both masculine and feminine. These are short-cut words, used to facilitate our understanding of the concepts. But they tend to, in the process, oversimplify the concepts, thus limiting them in our minds.

Masculine refers to the active principle; the feminine to the receptive principle. We assign these principles to specific genders because the anatomy of each gender actually corresponds symbolically to the principle it is associated with. For instance, the receptive principle is called the feminine principle - look at the womb, a receptacle for the active sperm, and for cradling the new life that will begin there. Look, too, at the way that the feminine body engages in sexual intercourse: it receives within itself the male, active sex organ. You can also see the truth of this in the reverse. The male or active principle is represented by the phallus, that active organ which thrusts into the receptive vagina and does not receive or hold anything within itself. It is the conductor of the sperm, into the waiting and receptive womb. But that's where the gender-related limitations on these two principles ends.

Look at the yin/yang symbol - a field of white, with a bit of black caught within in, married complementarily to a field of black, with a bit of white caught within it. We are each like one field or the other. Some of us are more predominantly white (or male, or active) and some are more predominantly black (or female, or receptive). But we each carry some measure of our complementary opposite within us. We all can call up either energy depending on what we're needing at any given time. Unfortunately, due to the gender roles that society teaches us to play, we often don't realize that and so we are crippled and limited and often feel vague stirrings of frustration, or we feel incompetent in certain areas.

It is possible, and even desirable, to learn to integrate these two principles within yourself. But first you have to learn your own manifestations of each, and learn to recognize your capacity for the qualities associated with each. You need to differentiate a bit, and rise up out of the unconscious beliefs you hold about yourself, before you can re-integrate each side fully and become a whole human being.

Sacred sexuality, in large part, is learning to integrate the many, often-disparate, parts of yourself (mind, body, spirit) through the powerful vehicle of your sexuality. In learning to approach sex in a sacred manner, you treat your body and its passions and pleasures with mindful attention, you learn to revere your body and that of your lover, you begin to see your own divinity shining through, and your orgasms begin to give you a glimpse of the interconnectedness of all beings. By learning to harness the sexual energy that dances both within yourself and throughout the universe, you can apply that energy in different, more focused and deliberate directions, such as magical workings, creative enterprises, or caretaking duties.

Engaging in sacred sexuality practices requires you to think about your intention and your technique, it requires you to feel fully and embrace your light and dark emotions, it requires you to connect with your higher Self.

The sacred inner marriage rite is one way to symbolically unite the two sides of your Self. The heiros gamos that most people are familiar with takes place between two individuals, usually the high priestess and her high priest, who embody and symbolize the Goddess and her Consort.

Taking this archetypal act and internalizing is quite powerful. But you need first to identify both your inner masculine/yang/anima and your inner feminine/yin/animus, before you can marry them, unifying your inner Self. We will explore some techniques for how to do this in a future essay.

Friday, February 02, 2007

Celebrating Imbolc

Happy Imbolc, everyone!

Although not everyone who may read this is pagan, I wanted to share the following in celebration of this holiday that I celebrate. The ritual I describe is one that I designed, and does not adhere to any particular tradition within paganism. For the adepts, this is also fairly basic and may not meet your needs. Take what works for you and move on. If anyone else would like to share what works for them, I'd love to hear about it!

~~~~~~~~~

Imbolc is the time of the quickening, when the earth begins to come back to life, in preparation for the blossoming of spring. This is the time of year in which we celebrate the Virgin or Maiden aspect of the Goddess, as she prepares for growth and renewal. In ancient times, the word "virgin" was used to denote a woman who was strong and independent, who was not tied to any man (neither father nor husband), a woman who could make her own decisions and direct her own life. She could have sexual relations when and with whom she desired, not when it was expected of her.

The lessons of the Virgin are appropriate for both men and women. During this time of the Virgin, you have an opportunity to stand up for yourself and your own needs, to ask for what you want and to take responsibility for your own stuff. You can clear out the old, to make way for the new, by doing some self-examination and being honest with yourself about what's holding you back from being the best that you can possibly be. Ask the Goddess in her Virgin aspect to assist you in becoming stronger about asserting your opinions, honoring your feelings, and doing the work it takes to live the life you want to live.

Masturbation Meditation:

This is a great opportunity to use masturbation as a sacred sexual tool to augment your spiritual practice. Remind yourself that your pleasure is your responsibility, and that there is nothing wrong with taking an opportunity to pleasure yourself. You'll want to make arrangements to ensure that you will not be disturbed. Also remember, in addition to your regular ritual supplies and tools, that you set aside, in your circle (whether on the altar or beside the bed), the supplies you'll need for your self-pleasuring ritual.

Sanctify your space and honor the elements or directions as you are comfortable and accustomed to. Then connect with the Goddess and state your intentions. ("Goddess, with this ritual, I desire to connect with myself more deeply, and to honor your gifts by pleasuring myself. I offer my pleasure, including whatever orgasms I may have, as an offering of love to you and to myself. Please guide me this day in feeling secure in the knowledge that I am a sacred being, that I am worthy of this pleasure.")

Sit or lie in a comfortable position, close your eyes, breathe deeply from your belly. Relax and begin to touch yourself lightly in non-sexual ways and places. Rub your arms, your legs, your back; scritch your head, massage your neck. Then gradually begin caressing yourself in loving ways, slowly allowing your hands to move to more erogenous areas. Allow the energy to become more erotic as you continue to touch yourself lovingly and sensually. When you are ready, begin to pleasure yourself in the manner you like best. Start slow and let the energy build. As you do this, repeat to yourself the following mantra: "I am sacred. Pleasure is sacred. I am worthy of this pleasure." The energy will build, your rhythm will increase, and your chanting may get louder (you can repeat it silently, as well, but when we say things out loud, our subconsicous works with them on a deeper level.) Continue pleasuring yourself and chanting your mantra until you approach orgasm or you're approaching some sense of satisfaction and culmination. Continue until you reach that energetic and/or physical peak, whereupon you will release the energy toward the Goddess, and you may shout, moan, scream or otherwise vocalize your gratitude to the Goddess.

Allow yourself to wallow in the after-glow with yourself and the Goddess for a few minutes. Allow the feelings of pleasure and satisfaction to gently and naturally subside. If you feel silly, embarassed or any other seemingly negative emotion, forgive yourself, hold yourself in compassionate space and assure yourself that all your feelings are valid. If you're feeling joy, power, happiness...revel in it....and thank the Goddess again! :)

This is just one suggestion for how to use sacred sexuality to honor and work with the energies of this season. Happy Imbolc, no matter how you choose to celebrate or observe it! :)

In sacred love & sensuality,
Inara

Monday, January 22, 2007

Essay - It's All About Sex


Inara de Luna (c) September 2005


Why is it always all about sex? Have you heard someone say this, or perhaps have you said it before? Many people tend to get disgusted with how much sex is used in advertising. “Sex sells,” is the standard response. We, as a society, want to relegate sex to private, monogamous, bedroom interactions. The military has its “Don’t ask; don’t tell” policy. Teachers and other professionals are encouraged to keep their relationship status out of their workplace in various ways. Movies and television shows and video games all have to clearly state if they include any type of sexual content, and many of these can only be shown at certain times or at certain places, and to certain people (those considered “of age”). Sex is a taboo topic of conversation in “polite” social situations, and many people would like for it to be completely obliterated from our children’s education.


What people don’t understand is that sex IS a part of everything. Sex is, literally, what makes the world go ‘round. The most obvious example of the truth of this, of course, is that if we didn’t have sex, none of us would be here. We need to reproduce as a species, and the best way to do so is through sexual intercourse. But there are so many other ways that the concept of sex can be seen to be present in all things.


Let’s look at the word “yoga,” for a moment. It means, in Sanskrit, “union.” Well, what does the word “union” mean? Basically, union is the bringing together of multiple things into one new thing. In yoga, it’s usually taken to mean that one uses the practices and techniques of yoga to achieve union between the mind, the body and the spirit. Or to achieve union between man and the divine, or between oneself and all of creation.


Sexual union is usually understood to be a joining between (usually) two people into what feels, briefly, like one new entity. Have you ever experienced that feeling of not knowing where your skin ends and your lover’s begins? Have you ever been so attuned to someone that it seemed as if you could read each other’s thoughts, or knew exactly what each other’s bodies were craving? Sex and yoga are both unions.


And if we expand our concept of sex to include the entire spectrum of sexuality practices, including the dance of attraction, then we can explore our metaphor further. The sexual dance of the cosmos, the sexual interplay of atoms and molecules…the “marriage” of ideas…engaging in conversational intercourse…sex is a give and take, a play of interrelation, a joining and melding and unifying force, however that force manifests.


If we weren't so afraid of the power of that force, we could relax into it and enjoy the many ways we can interact with that force. Perhaps it's too much of a stretch to think of sex as a universal force. Think of it this way: sexual energy and creative energy come from the same source - the universal life force. We are always constantly creating in multitudes of ways: fixing dinner, crafting a persuasive argument, designing the layout of your new house, even dressing yourself everyday is an act of creation. That creative energy, at its core, is the same as the generative energy associated with sex. We call on the same life force energy when we decided to create something new, or just to practice creating something new (as in a baby, during sex).

Have you ever experienced a rush of ecstacy outside of the bedroom? A final triumphal moment in a game or race, a deeply satisfying sense of accomplishment upon completion of a major or important task, a deep sense of contentedness, serenity or joy in any situation...these are all akin to the orgasmic rush at the peak of a sexual experience. Even supposedly non-sexual spiritual mystics enjoyed moments of ecstasy in communion with their Creator or God, moments which sound suspiciously like sexual gratification when reading their own descriptions of the experience.

Sex can be seen as to be pervasive in all things and you can learn to recognize the sensual dimension of every part of your life, thus making of your life a sacred sensual expression of divine communion. It is all about sex...but that's not such a bad thing....



Friday, December 29, 2006

Creation of new yahoo group on Sacred Sexuality

Hello all!!

For the last couple of years, I have been running a succesful private yahoo group called CLASS_Atl (Celebrating Love and Sacred Sexuality in Atlanta). Although that group is still going strong, I wanted to create an additional group to meet the need for this kind of discussion on a larger level. The Atlanta group consists largely of people who already know each other from the local pagan festival scene and the related communities. This new group CLASS_USA will be open to the public, although new people will have to go through an application process, so that I can screen out those who are just looking to spam new sex-related groups. I will keep this group tightly focused on our discussion theme and I won't tolerate disrespect between members.

If you are interested in learning more and sharing, I encourage you to come visit us!

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/CLASS_USA/

Lovingly,
Inara de Luna